While at Hulk's, I started watching a TV show called The Nate Show. It wasn't the first time I've seen it but it was the first time I actually sat down to give it more than a glance. In this particular episode, they had a couple come up on stage and put the following labels in order of priority importance:
Job -- Friends -- Children -- Relationship -- Vacation -- Hobbies -- Sex
I was shocked at how the couple on stage had arranged their labels. They had put children up at the top. They both agreed that they had lost each other in having children and revolving their lives around that of their children. I thought this was actually sad. Sex was the last on their list and I was shocked, as was the entire crowd and the couple therapists showcasing on the show. I don't think it's got to be a "priority" really but couple time and, as the Koreans say, "skinship" definitely should be. There's a lot to be said about spending some down time in the arms of the person you love. I've never been one of those attached-at-the-hips girl but I definitely see the importance in sharing a strong chemistry and attraction to whomever you're with. I mean, if you don't want to get all gushy, hug and kiss the one you're with then well, that says something and it's not good. Even after over 35 years of marriage, my parents still always held hands and snuck kisses.
I don't have children but I could totally see how so many people I know have become just like this couple, putting their children above everything. I have some friends who are all about their kids, to the point where I really don't know what to talk to them about when we do meet up because their life clearly is all about them. It's rather annoying too because I really have nothing to bring to their conversations besides a life style that some of them have labeled as being "the old me". I happen to prefer the old them, the person who used to be spontaneous and be able to relax.
I wrote down all 7 labels on post-it notes and decided to put them in the order of importance to me.
1. Relationship
I consider myself extremely blessed to have married my best friend -- a man who I will continually pick out in a crowd as the sexiest man. He has also turned into my business partner -- the creator of my dream come true. And he's my bad boy turned good, well good to me. I always tell him, "I don't care if you're bad to everyone else, just be good to me", and he knows what 'me' includes -- close friends and family. I think me being a foreigner in Korea definitely puts more onus on our relationship because I do depend on him for things I struggle with here that wouldn't be an issue back in Canada and he's become like a safety net for me too.
2. Job
I love my job, I absolutely love it and that's no secret. Our boxing club is still very new so it's definitely a high priority in our lives. I think to step away from it and take on any other job at this point would just be a step down but then again where do we go from here -- when you've already reached your dream, what's next?! Exactly. We have some strong ideas on what's next but right now we're looking to focus on our current members, keep them training hard and happy, and really securing a steady membership of solid, positive people.
I still catch myself giggling at the thought that I've created my own job; sometimes it just doesn't seem real. I'm living in a foreign country, getting paid to share with people my passion for health, fitness and boxing in a business establishment that I helped build with Snickers. My business partner is my husband, my co-worker is a friend I've hired, and I make the rules. Initially we really focused in on the foreign population of Cheonan, hoping to help bring it together and make a strong sense of community among them. We wanted to be like a kind of clubhouse for them, a place where they can feel comfortable and feel a part of. However, in striving to do this, I don't think I've become closer with the foreign crowd but more so with the Korean locals. We've got a increasingly high percentage of young Korean women training at Hulk's so I am so happy to see the shift in thinking of Korea's younger generation, in particular the females. I can't express how grateful I am to be running a boxing club at a time where the old school Korean mentality is changing and women are practicing the breaking of stereotypes. It's also been very encouraging to see just how foreign-friendly our Korean members are. I've never met so many Koreans who try so hard to either communicate in English or try extra hard to connect the dots with my Korean. There's no "I don't speak English" or stepping away from me because I'm a foreigner, something that outside of our club I constantly run into.
3. 4-Legged Friends (originally "children")
My days used to be spent a lot at home with my pups but these days I'm pulling long hours at Hulk's. Of course my days aren't as long as when we were initially renovating and setting up Hulk's though. Regardless, I've always felt strong that people with pets need to commit to them or don't get them in the first place. It'd be one thing if we got our four-legged pups now, a decision I think would be totally irresponsible and inappropriate, but we got them when we did have the excessive time and building Hulk's was never a near-future thing. We always thought we'd wait till Canada to commit ourselves to creating any kind of dream job but low and behold it's now alive and well. None the less, we still make considerable effort to give them the time, effort and love they deserve because, well, they give us lots of love and the proof is in how they greet us when we wake up and enter the house. Whether it's special drives out to their favourite parks and playing spots, bringing them to work, or sneaking home during work hours to play with them, we try hard to continue making them very much a big part of our life.
4. Sex... included "skinship" here
Ah skinship, spooning, and all that gushy stuff. I don't think Snickers and I are particularly affectionate out in public but we definitely are attached at the hips at home. Our ankles are crossed during movie time, we hold hands when we go to sleep, and we always kiss before we take a sip of that first morning coffee and when we eat together. We try not to be too affectionate at Hulk's because we don't want to be one of those annoying couples that make others uncomfortable but we do have our little moments together. Often Snicker's afternoon naps turn into spontaneous spooning time together and then there's all the bum-pinching that goes on behind the juice bar when members are oblivious or random pecks.
5. Hobbies
I really didn't know where to put this because my hobbies include health and fitness but now I've turned them into my job so for this particular label, I focused on my other hobbies. My other hobbies include writing, homepaging, cooking up new health-conscious creations, watching movies, and cruising on my scooter. I also love making YouTube videos but haven't in so long -- too long.
6. Friends
In the nine years that I've been here in Korea, I've gone from being quite the social butterfly with lots of friends to being quite picky with just who I spend my time with and label my friend. I have associates, friends, then there are my close friends and my K-Crew. Most of my K-Crew members are Korean pro athletes whom I am close with and have known since I started boxing in Korea professionally. Among my K-Crew, there are two pro tennis players, a pro golfer, a pro motorcross racer, six pro boxers, as well as a couple of street racers and underground fighters. For the most part, my K-Crew consists of other pro athletes or Korean friends whom I have known since my first two years in Korea. I've labeled them my K-Crew because I know I can call them up at any hour of the day/night and depend on them for whatever. I am very open and honest with my K-Crew and I love them but I can't say I'm particularly close to any of them like a close friend, well, with the exception of Junior Mint and he's not so minty-fresh and close anymore. As for close friends, my best friend is Snickers, I have one close foreign friend, and I have two close male Korean friends -- Buff Boy the Original and Panty Boy.
7. Free Time/Vacation
Right now my free time is limited and the thought of vacation is not even a thought in my mind. I have one day off a week but much rather be spending it working at Hulk's because I love my job and it gives me a lot of satisfaction. I'm proud to be in love with my job and to have made a business out of my passions so even on my days off I am known to head into the club to do random errands.
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