I'm going to tell you a story of one Pesky Parker gone wild, perhaps questionably crazy. And though I can laugh about it now, I must admit it wasn't funny when it was actually happening, hence why three members stuck around the club longer than anticipated. We all thought a fight would break out between him and I or he'd return to retaliate. "Let a fight happen", I told my members. "I need the sparring practice."
The club had only been open half an hour when I went to go do my "Parker Run" and by that I mean I went to go gather the numbers of the Pesky Parkers out front and at the side so that I could text message them to move. My ignored text messages were then followed by me taping my no parking signs on their front window, 30 minutes later. And with all the Pesky Parkers officially branded via my no parking signs, I headed to the back of the club to continue fixing up the girls' private shower stall while one member started on his warm-up training.
No sooner did I roll up my pants and get ankle deep in the caked concrete but my member came running up to me. "Coach Amy... parking car man... not nice.... so many fire. Fire, fire, fire!!!" I assumed he was talking about a Pesky Parker and that the "fire" meant he was angry so I washed my feet put on my sweater and shoes and then headed to the front of the club. Instantly I knew, yes, "fire" meant angry. I approached the relatively young man -- the young Pesky Parker -- and introduced who I was and asked what the problem was. I hadn't even finished my question when all of a sudden he started yelling at me. I'm talking about the occasional drop of water flying from his mouth and arms flying here and there kind of yelling -- very dramatic. We stood there in the front window, him yelling and me trying to either get him to follow me inside the club or step outside. I wanted to make sure I caught this whole dramatic event on camera, for my own sake and the sake of my club. He yelled and yelled and then every so often he's burst into a laughter. "This guy is clearly crazy", I thought to myself. My member who had notified me that this guy had come into the club stood beside me and I could read by his facial expression that he definitely was thinking the same thing.
As almost everyone who knows me knows just how much these Pesky Parkers get to me and by Pesky Parkers I mean non-members who park in my members-only parking spots. They have become my biggest pet peeve with running Hulk's. I mean, how many postings and times have I brought this very issue up on my homepage? Exactly!!! I've tried to make light of the situation by posting sarcastic no parking signs on their cars but the fact of the matter is park in my parking lot and I'd love to break out a crazy like never seen before and every day my patience with them is testing. It drives me bonkers, they (the Pesky Parkers) drive me bonkers. It'd be one thing if they simply said sorry but in the 9 months that I've been dealing with this on a daily bases I have yet to hear such words come out of any Pesky Parker's mouth.
What I don't understand about Pesky Parkers:
-- They never appologize!!! This fact right absolutely boggles my mind.
-- They always feel they have the right to get mad at me.
-- Somehow their lack of respect for following one simple rule is always made out to be my fault. MY parking lot + THEIR choice to ignore the sign and park their car = MY fault...wait, what?!
-- They all think the embarrassingly big 18ft x 6ft no parking sign doesn't apply to them.
-- They always take their pretty time to move their car when I ask them nicely but suddenly drop everything when I lie and text them that their car has been hit.
I have tried to be nice, after all you'll win more bees with honey as they say but I say screw the bees. Why the heck do I want bees?! Exactly. I've always used a fly swatter for the bees; it's proven quite effective. I can't exactly go hitting the Pesky Parkers away though I have been tempted and many times in my head I have envisioned myself making a lovely speedbag out of their head. I have to be calm, cool and collective when dealing with them. Today's Pesky Parker definitely tested my patience with being all in my face and yelling at me while he stood inches from my face. At one point I turned to the Hulkie standing behind me and, in Korean, I told him to tell the guy to leave or I am seriously going to hit him.
His argument was that he now can't get the double-sided tape I had used for the no parking sign off his car and, I told him, that is not my problem. "Consider yourself lucky" I told him. "The sign reads that your car will be towed." When he asked me how he could get the tape off his car, I told him simple nail polish removal does the trick and he stepped forward to yell "I don't have a girlfriend". I sarcastically responded by saying "With manners like this I know why you don't. You come into my business and yell at me, a personal you have never met before, and say it is my problem that you decided to park your car in my lot, where a sign so clearly says no parking."
The customer is always right, as they say in the business world, but these Pesky Parkers aren't my customers, they're just wrong. And this guy was beyond wrong with his lack of manners so I called him on it. I've never ever had a Pesky Parker quite like this guy. The argument ended when two other members drove by, saw me standing by the front door, and yelled out "Coach Amy, there's no parking spots!" It was perfect timing, I couldn't have planned it better even if I had tried, and with that the Pesky Parker gave up and moved his car.
No comments:
Post a Comment