In unofficial news, Snickers is leaving Korea. He told me this just recently. He doesn't know where he's going, when he's going, but you can best believe his reason why to leave Korea is pretty on par with why I left. I told him before we got married that if we ever got a divorce it'd be because of this very reason too.
Family... the expectations, roles, responsibilities, social norms, cultural differences and pressures that come with it. They say when you marry a Korean you marry their family but, in my case, their unit as a so-called family didn't fit my definition of what a healthy family was so I tried to keep myself at a distance. Abuse ran in their family and I didn't want to be a part of it but in more ways than one I most definitely was.
I know he and I can't blame them totally for our fall out but the apple doesn't fall from the tree and so ya I do hold them partly responsible for his ill doing in that his immediate family knew what was really going down behind closed doors and they never tried to protect me or aid me. I was so new to this hush-hush kind of "way of life", a total new comer, and had been raised in a Christain home where I can't even honestly remember the last time my dad and mom so much as yelled at each other. Now I was in this whole other world and was learning as I went, to survive on my own. They never stuck up for me, instead they bullied me. Their only offer of help was in telling me "just don't make him mad". But you can only take so much so when I reached the point where I could no longer take it anymore and I honestly felt like I was going to die there before ever seeing my family in Canada again, I got the hell out of there.
It'll be 2yrs this summer since I left them all in Korea and I have yet to hear from any of them. They know they were wrong in what they put me through and they know I was right in leaving.
Snickers says he's done with Korea but I know it's not "Korea" he's done with Koreans and a specific "group" of Koreans. I know he must be getting rained on for me leaving and I can't say I feel sorry for him but I can say that their ignorance to what they've done is disgusting.
Isn't it ironic, the situation I'm in now. Yet again I find myself overseas, in the country I always said I would have moved to if I hadn't moved to Korea, and the pull for me to possibly stay here longer is the very thing that had me packing my bags and running for the border in Korea.
I have an "adopted family" that resides here in the Philippines and they're beautiful. They've been nothing but supportive and encouraging, to the point where they've said they'd join my business if I ever were to open it here instead of Canada. My adopted Filipino family says they love my business idea and yet my Korean family, my former in-laws in Korea, wouldn't even introduce me as the manager and co-owner of Hulk's Club. Their son and I built the biggest club in Korea and yet they continue to introduce me as "Amy the university professor", wow. I quit that job well over 7 years ago and yet that's the only label they seem note worthy for me to wear.
I know you can't pick your family but you can divorce yourself from them and for that reason I support Snickers with wanting to get the hell out of Korea. I have nothing but support for his decision but in doing so it raises the question of what will become of Pyen Chi and Pacquiao.
Pac is a wild child that is more of a security dog than one to cuddle with. He needs either a lot of exercise or a big open space to freely run and exhaust himself in. As for Pyen, she's super lazy unless you initiate play time with her. She's only 6 but is like an old woman in that she's perfectly happy sitting by the window all day, people watching until she falls asleep. In a perfect world, my father would offer to take in Pyen Chi and I'd take Pac. Pyen would live at my father's house and Pac would live with me. I'd visit Pyen every so often, to make sure she's okay, and I'd make Pac my running partner.
This summer it'll be two years since I packed up my life of 11 years into two suitcases and left Korea. This spring I'll be heading back there to visit and to grab some of my stuff. I have absolutely no desire to run into Snicker's immediate family though I will admit that I'd love to see Granny Kim and some of his aunts and cousins again. His extended family was never an issue for me; they were closer to me than his immidate. I'm more so afraid of running into his immediate family than the complications and awkwardness that will come with seeing Snickers again. I'm afraid of lashing out at them, to tell you the truth. I have way too much to say to them to even know what to say and I can see it going from 0 to 100 real fast. My plan is to go there during the week, being sure to stay at the club only when it's open, and then making my exit to a hotel I don't plan on telling anyone I'm staying at. I don't want any drama. I just want to grab my stuff, see my dogs, and deal with some legal stuff with Snickers. It's not vacation and it's not going to be easy. Saying bye to my dogs was hard enough the first time and I fully expect it to leave me crushed to have to do it again.
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