I don't know what's worse, Christmas gift shopping or having to buy shorts for my Christmas vacation. I got out of shopping by baking but now all that "baking" (ie baking for others but eating as I baked) is making me uncomfortable about having to wear shorts. If I go the full 12 rounds at boxing tonight it's because shopping for shorts didn't go over well.
This week I'm heading out to Florida on Christmas Eve. I'll be in the States for Christmas. I'm not going to start complaining about it because I know I should be overly grateful for the invite, how I'm being treated it to it, and how it is also Christmas for those I'm going with too, but my fear is that I'm going to be that person that not only kills the family trip but also kills Christmas.
I don't like Christmas and this year I'm spending Christmas with someone born on Christmas Eve, someone whose very name translates to Christmas.
Right about now he's reading this and doing a face palm... I know it, but he doesn't really know why I came to being such a Scrooge during the biggest holiday of the year, Christmas.
Every Christmas after that though she anticipated me showing up.
I never did.
I never spent another Christmas with my mom and every year that broke her heart. And now I hate Christmas. I still haven't spent a Christmas with my family. Last year I spent Christmas Eve in the bathtub and then I raced off to my boxing buddy's home to ring in Christmas with his family but it took every ounce of will power to get up and do that.
This Christmas marks another Christmas I won't be celebrating it with them. My mom has since passed on, my oldest brother spends Christmas with his family up north, my other brother spends it with his wife in the States, and then there's my dad and me. My dad hasn't celebrated Christmas since my mom died but I stopped celebrating it long before she passed. I used to get Snickers to celebrate it with me but he only went through the motions to make me happy. He never liked any holiday and every year I bought myself my own Christmas present. I've always bought my own birthday present too, come to think of it. I threw a big sleepover Christmas party for my Flipside Fitness gals one year and then I did stuff for my Hulkies at Hulk's Club but it was me celebrating it for them and not really feeling it myself.
Christmas died the year after I celebrated it with my family here in Canada and failed to show up the next year.