The amount of Konglish, brutally broken English, misused and misinterpreted vocab, and definitely mispronounced words I come across on a daily bases with running a bilingual boxing club is nothing short of overly entertaining and ultimately amusing.
Tonight's misused English word: player
Intentional meaning: professional athlete
THE SCENE:
Six new Hulkies follow me into the weight training area because Snickers has just informed them that they're going to do a crossfit circuit class with me.
GUY 1: Weight training with you, yes? Oh, no problem.
ME: Oh no,... problem! [Enter my I'm-going-to-kick-your-butt-like-no-chick-ever-has smirk here.]
GUY 2: We... 6 pack ab training want.
ME: OK, let's do the Spartan circuit then. [I then explain how there's three different levels of difficulty.]
GUY 2: We men, level 3, no problem.
ME: Again, problem. Only about 5 people at Hulk's can do level 3.
GUY 3: Can you?
ME: Yes.
GUY 3: Then we level 3, yes.
SIDE NOTE:
The difference between level 1 and 3 is a matter of doing 4 sets of 15 for the 5 exercises (level 1) and doing 1 set of 60 for each (level 3). I would have done level 1 with them but because of their comment I thought sure, let's challenge them, so I started level 3. By the 10th rep of the very first set one guy starts to yell out.
GUY 1: You crazy?!
ME: Um... what?
GUY 1: Level 3 impossible.
ME: No, I can do level 3.
GUY 2: Because you player!!!
GUY 4: She player?
GUY 2: Yes, she play!
ME: Wait... What?! Why am I a player? What do I play?
GUY 2: You player. I normal man.
ME: OK, and I am a normal girl.
GUY 5: You smile like girl but not normal.
GUY 2: Ya, yup...because you player.
GUY 5: NOT normal. Player... Plaaaaaaayer!
EXTRA SIDE NOTE:
I should note here that by this point in the conversation, with them continually yelling that I am a player, the foreign members present have all stopped training so that they can listen in. It was causing quite a scene. And while all us foreigners were laughing at their obvious misuse of the English word player and caught on that actually meant athlete, our giggling only caused them to yell louder and use and abuse the word more.
SCENE CONCLUSION
I never did explain to them their misuse of the word or what word was more appropriate, instead I decided to have fun with them and tease them. "Don't be hating on the player. You only hate the player because you can't be the player!" I joked and, on that note, for the rest of their time at Hulk's tonight I called them all players. I even went so far as to label their two lockers "Not 5 Players" and "5 Normal Guys".
OK, so perhaps you had to be in attendance to get the full humour of the scene but trust me when I say it was one of those borderline make-you-pee-your-pants kind of moment for all present!!! It was so hilarious and because we were having so much fun training together and teasing each other, Snickers and I decided to throw a watermelon party for everyone at the club. We then sat nibbling on watermelon and calling each other "player" for another good thirty minutes or so.
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