I realized a bit too late that today was actually my fifth year wedding anniversary and not tomorrow like I had originally thought it was. But, as it turned out, it was definitely best that I made this mistake anyways and didn't try to celebrate it today because a lot of poop hit the fan today.
I couldn't even celebrate today even if I wanted to.
For starters, my sleep last night was interrupted by the sound of a very distressed person on the other end of my phone and then I was woken later this morning by another distressed person. It was Mouse Doctor telling me I was now going to be attending a funeral. So I had a ton of phone calls and emails to follow up with phone call number one and then one funeral to attend because of phone call number two. And now people know why I don't like talking on the phone and accepting calls. It always seems to be connected to bad news.
In between dealing with phone call one and phone call two, I got in my weekly long run. I needed this long run and probably would have ran much longer too. Running lets me disconnect from everything and dissect it at the same time. When I'm running, my mind wonders and everything just becomes so much clearer.
One lost person and the death of another, but that wasn't all.
There was definitely an odd sensation unloading a truck full of furniture from a friend's business that went under. I mean, I love the pieces I scored and was more than willing to break my back and bend over backwards with getting a truck and putting in the rough physical work of moving it all, but her loss was my gain. It was a total bitter sweet moment, when you want to feel happy for your gain but you know it came at a cost of someone else and that someone else is close to you.
Then, as if today wasn't enough for me to choke on and digest with all the down moments, right before I went to sleep I checked my Facebook. I had received a message. A friend from high school had passed away. I should have just left it at that and sought out answers after a good nights' sleep but noooooo, I'm way too curious of a girl to just leave it at that. I had to inquire. As it turns out, he had committed suicide, a fact I now wish I hadn't found out. Unfortunately I've known many people here in Korea who have committed suicide, from a former student of mine who told me beforehand to an actual in-law of mine.
I went to bed tonight, finally went to bed that is, all worried about my friends in Canada. Suicide is definitely more common here in Korea which doesn't make it any less harsh but I think because it is more common that it is more talked about. I don't know how my friends in Canada are dealing with this and if they're really talking about it. A former field hockey teammate of mine had noted that he told her he was depressed and was well aware of his issues but I'm curious as to why he never got the help he needed if he was so open about his situation. And now, there's a long line of victims left behind, including an ex-wife and two children. I worry about them and I worry about his immediate family and all friends.
I started the day on a super rough note and ended it on a sad note, so I was more than happy when I realized long after it was almost over that today was in fact my anniversary. So, in my head, tomorrow will be my anniversary. Today just flat out sucked with sad stories and bad feelings.
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