Yesterday I was approached by the coach of the female fighter I recently sparred with for the TV show we filmed. He wants me to sign for a fight with her. In discussing it with him he noted his frustration that there aren't many female fighters actively fighting these days. I totally could relate to his frustration but my frustration comes attached to other frustrations and most recently it's the idea that I feel choked here in Korea. I feel so limited here as a boxer and as a coach, manager and co-owner of Hulk's. Where I want to be and where I am are two different places and it's not just language that separates the two and prevents me from excelling it's also the politics, social norms and cultural expectations.
As a co-owner, manager and coach at Hulk's, I want to do so much more and be so much more. I want to get my personal training license, do a first aid course, organize intercity amateur tournaments, launch a potential sponsor program with the local schools, start an online active homepage for our members, change some of the administrative roles and tasks I've taken on by hiring help or upgrading our computer... etc., etc.
As a professional boxer, I also want to do so much more and be so much more. I want to train with a coach who doesn't have a language barrier or conflict of interest to fight through just to train me -- a coach who's not my husband. I want to have more sparring opportunities beyond sparring with high school boys or having to set things up a month in advance. I want to train beside boxers who can show me more than just a thing or two at training, who can discuss their years of experience and help me expand upon my acquired skills. I want to fight not as a foreigner or some kind of cash cow for others to milk but just as a fighter.
I don't know if I can do all this in Korea. I've come to the assumption that I can't.
I love my job in Korea, I absolutely love it, but I feel I solely live for it. I've let it consume me 24/7, there is no off switch, and the proof of it is in the fact that even on my down time, my time off, I spend it with sponsors and/or organize work-related things to keep myself working -- morning Thundra runs, after work sponsor meetings, weekend Free Train, and Saturday evening Hulk family dinners. I'm always on but the potential for upgrade seems so restricted and this has become a frustration and burden.
Snickers and I had a long talk about this and have come to the conclusion that it's best I leave Korea. I'm not too sure when, probably in the next month or two, but I'll be heading off to Canada to live -- a one year sabbatical. I've been in contact with several boxing clubs in Toronto and the surrounding area and many of them have expressed their willingness to give me work/volunteer experience. I've also contact several important boxing contacts that have expressed their excitement over this and eagerness to help me out. The plan is to rent a one room and spend my days consumed in boxing -- seek out my potential and expand myself. I need to get out of Korea if I want any chance at reaching the potential I eagerly crave so that's what I'm going to do.
See you soon Canada.
No comments:
Post a Comment