Staying here at Sick Kids has been exceptionally hard at me and the proof is in the puke that's in the towel of some random Med student who came to my rescue. I was standing at the elevator when it happened, when my hero came to my aid. The elevator doors had opened up and there stood two parents with their young baby in a stroller. I smiled, looked at them and then looked down at their baby. Suddenly I realised what it was I was looking at. The baby wasn't in a blanket, like I had initially thought, it was in a full body cast. The mother asked if I was going down and I froze. I didn't know what to say. I just stood there. The father saw my reaction and rushed to push the down button. He knew what I had seen had totally shocked me. The elevator doors closed, I continued to stand there. The elevator beside it came up, those doors opened, and I continued to stand there. I stood there and wobbled a bit. I heard someone say something to me but couldn't make out their words. I just stood there and then I wobbled some more but then out of nowhere some Med student rushed to my side and put a towel up to my mouth. That's when I puked.
Sick Kids is a beautiful hospital and if there's any place for your sick child to be it is definitely here but it's also definitely intense on a whole other level. I have never walked through Sick Kids but I've been here since yesterday and I've been in so many rooms, floors and halls of this place. I've seen mini crutches so small it's hard to even believe a kid that would use them is even old enough to walk in the first place. I've seen an x-ray room painted with cartoon characters in planes, a wheelchair that's so small it looks more like a toy than a functional chair.
My heart broke with every kid I see here.
I don't know how the doctors, nurses and staff work here. They must have amazingly big and amazingly strong hearts to go through this every single day they come here. I personally struggled to be here but felt so incredibly happy my nephew was here because I knew he was being treated by the best.
Yesterday in the bed beside my nephew, when he was in the post operating waiting room, there was a 16 year old boy. He had the same disease that Terry Fox had in his legs. Yesterday this boy had his legs and was preparing for his first day of school at high school but today he was now lying there with no legs. They had removed them from the knees down. At age 16 I would have been going through my closet tonight, trying to figure out which outfit to wear and what shoes to match it with, like most kids, but here was a boy who had so much more to deal with than the pettiness of a first day of school outfit.
I've seen so many kids dealing with issues that little kids really shouldn't have to deal with and with each one I saw the strings of my heart was pulled.
In the bed across from my nephew laid a little 16 month old baby girl. She's been in the hospital for the past 15 months of her life and has had 2 heart surgeries, if I remember correctly. It was either 2 or 4.
I stayed at the hospital today with my nephew and sister-in-law. I couldn't leave. I could see my sister-in-law trying her best to be strong but she's a mother, her son was hanging on to life but struggling, and I couldn't let her be here alone. It was incredibly hard for me to stay there but I knew this wasn't about me. This was about a little seven year old boy and his mother who needed me to be strong so strong was what I tried my hardest to be.
My sister-in-law has been here numerous times with both her sons. The nurses know them well and so does the doctors. It doesn't mean it's any easier for her though, this I know. It only meant she knew the routine but yesterday's visit was an emergency, unscheduled visit, and she had come alone.
I was a shoulder for my sister-in-law to lean on, a friend and helper for my nephew to depend on, and a buffer between my sister-in-law and the nurses when things got really intense. I had stayed last night and tonight I also stayed. I don't think I slept a wink though considering the drama that went down tonight, wow. The short of the long story was my nephew was mismedicated and my sister-in-law was the one who caught it. The doctor and nurses had insisted her telling them that something was wrong was just her being a typical mom, super overprotective and hyper, but then it was discovered that she in fact was right. They ended up moving my nephew to his very own private room, to smooth things over. I think they feared her suing them actually,.. clearly. She just wanted them to listen though and to make her son better so when they finally did that, did both, she let it drop. I don't know if I would have done the same though so props to her.
The whole ordeal left me flustered and even more stressed. I was so flustered in fact that I ended up breaking my toe, yup. Nice. I ended up staying tonight, slept another night at the hospital, but I don't think I slept a wink tonight. After the whole scare with his medicine I laid there watching him for what felt like the entire night.
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